Ban Qing Ge - Shorty Yuen (Lyrics)

can i have real hope once again? ...

seeing so many of my frens in love...
envy feels my heart n soul...
looking back...i hv not only lost hope in love...
i lost hope in myself...
i stopped loving myself...
i stopped believing that i too worth somethg...

maybe...
maybe God allow him to come back to my life...
to help me to really really let him go...
to hv hope once again in love...
can i? will i? i leave it all to Him...

its been an embarsing day...but its so sweet :)

oh my dear Jesus, tq so much for today...its been such a wonderful day...

though so embarassing...but its so sweet... :')

today, before lunch i realize tat my purse is not in my bag!! 

i rmb leaving my purse on d table outside d meeting room where all d QPS staffs are sitting...

nervously i told ms anne...& she actually told d others incase they did saw it...

i was scared...in my mind i was thking of all d hussle of making a new ic, making police report, going to d bank to unblock n get a new bank card!! ...i tried to not show my nervousness...though im "so sure" its not at home!...i told them tat i'll jz go back & check, and they all should not worry...

oh my gdness...its rite in my pocket :P 

happily but "a bit" shy...i went back to d hospital & join ms anne for lunch...

ms anne : "aiyo...yvonne, u dunno how Jason look for your purse...he went to d boxes, look around d table u're sitting & most of all he even korek d green tong sampah!!" 

i was thking..."oh my gdness....d green tong sampah? d dirty tong sampah wif all d tissue paper n food??"  :S

ms anne : "hahahaha...if its other ppl i thk surely he will ask tat person to korek herself!" 

huhuhu...I'M SO DAMN SHY!! ms anne, this is not d time to joke...im really so shy & so sorry...

oh my gdness...die lerr...i feel lk i wanna dig a hole n cover myself in it or at least jz hide underneath d table...

:')...although its so damn embarassing to be such a careless person...

but wat he did was soooo sweet...but, i thk its bcoz it involves incident report in QPS :P 

hehe...eee...its still so so sweetly unbelievable... :D 

oh no...i still don't know how to face him tmr...

ms anne suddenly told me tat i should "make more friends...n get around more ppl"...

i thk its jz d advice tat i need....

but, how do i get around being so shy around ppl? sigh** where do i start if tat is wat i want to learn? :( 

tq Jesus for everythg...

last nite was a sad nite...where i decided to really move on...
how? i actually thought tat by transfering my thoughts to thking tat i like Jason... :P 

& look what an embarassing thg happened today...

i didnt answer aaron's call last nite & ths morning...

partly coz i was sleeping & working...(though d ME would answer)

i thought of really letting him GO...he called again in d evening...it was a gd chat...as i hv so much to tell him...

mayb tats how it should be... izit?? i don't know...to let him go as far as he wants...& jz waits for him to come back...hopefully he will each & everytime :'( 

tq Jesus for everythg...wif all my heart & all my soul..

bored...

define desperado...
define fake...
define blind..
define unloved...
define lost...
define uncertainty...
define broken...

its me...
am i trying too hard to be happy?
who am i?
unloved? no one will ever hate yvonne...
she's always nice n lovely...
no matter how she scolds =.='''

bumb into instructor aida today...
wat am i doing? "i've been kicked out of d ward" T.T
"yvonne?? being kicked out??? ceh,who would kick yvonne out?"
tats so sweet pn aida... :) tq so much!!

i lack personality...
im a nice lovely gal...on d outside...
nice to look at...but not nice to touch :P
Jesus, help me to go out there...n find myself...
gv me d courage to make frens...old & young...
to build ME...a new ME :( 

G.NA - Rumors [Eng Sub]

fear...

i wish i'll die, when breathing seems difficult...
i wish i'll stop breathing, when tears can't stop flowing...

but still i'll let you go...
if letting you go, gives you happiness...
as long as you're happy...
even with tears of sadness...
tears of missing you...
tears of not being able to love you...
i will be happy for you...
i will smile for you...

my dear...promise me...
that you will be happy...
i'll be miserable if i do not know how u're doing...
whether you still hv headaches or feeling dizzy?
whether you're losing weight more n more?
whether you're drinking & smoking more than you should?
n most of all...whether will she love you for me?
i know you'll be happier being wif some1 you love more...

i know you'll take gd care of yourself...
tats why i should stop reacting like im a superwoman...
while there's ntg i could do for you...
my dear...
i wish i'll forget everythg that ever happen btw us...
coz its all jz a dream...
a dream tat i thought is too gd to be true...
but the truth is...d dream is never real before...

i found the way to let you leave...

loving you...
day & nite, every minute, every second...
deep down inside, i know...
i know im not the one tat u love...
n to keep you is selfish...

how long will i cry...
i don't know...

waiting all alone in d bus stop...
i finally hv a car...
ths lonely road...i will travel alone...
hoping tat you will find d one tat you love...

made a wrong turn, i miss d road
where am i going...i don't know...
cars around me everywhere...
where are you all going?
i lost my way once again...
road signs...i can't see heaven...
where i wanted to be...
all i can do...is jz continue driving...
hoping tat someday...i'll find eternity...

its dark out there, its scary...
oh Father, when will you take me home?

only hope...

dear Lord,

my heart...is full of tears...

im so scared...im so scared of what's gonna happen...

i can't let go...i dun wanna let go...

i can't breathe...i can't cry...n i jz wanna die...

pentecost is tmr...

deep down in my heart i still chosed him instead of You...

You who is always there for me...

when tears flow, when heart pounds, when breathing seems so difficult & painful...

dear Lord...when will u take me home? 

i know...
it's almost time... :'(